Monday, February 13, 2012

That Sad Moment...

...when you realize, years after the fact, that you made a potential horrible mistake in life.

What decision am I referring to? There are plenty of things I wish I have done. Not chase Dacia after going to Temple. Ask out Cherisse. Been a little less of a bitch with Sabine (yep, most of my bad decisions deal with women and/or pussing out).

But the main decision I'm regretting: Looking for a job in Philly with much more gusto.

When I think about my life here, in Boston, the one thing I wish I had was a really good friend. Like, someone I didn't have to fake myself around. Someone I could be my bad-freestyling, terribly-eating-habit-having, corny-joke-making self. And I had that in spades in Philly after graduating.

I mean, not to disparage the people I know, hang out with (on occasion) and work with here. But, I really miss the camaraderie of my Philly friends. And I just don't have anything like that here.

And I think how that affects other things in my life. I have few friends, none that I hang out with on a regular basis and very little social life. Which makes finding women incredibly hard.

 Not that I don't have any other "You're FUCKED" qualities, but this one is big.

I mean, it's not that I absolutely hate living in Boston. I'm close to my family, I kinda like my job and the people I work with. But sometimes, just sometimes, I miss friends.

I'm 29 years old. It's fucking impossible to find new friends. People are getting married. Having kids. Doing real shit in life. These hypothetical people don't have time for my ass.

That's it...that's all I got...just some reflection shit...

~ Derek

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

2012 NFL Off-season.

From here:

New England Patriots: ‎"Team Needs: CB, DE, WR.

Their Super Bowl run proved once again that the Patriots are superbly coached by Bill Belichick and have a great QB in Tom Brady, which allowed them to overcome some personnel deficiencies. The team's biggest problem area is the secondary, where the Patriots had to use wide receiver Julian Edelman late in the season. Their No. 31-ranked pass defense is somewhat misleading, as teams had to throw on the Pats once they fell behind. But the Patriots could not match up for 60 minutes with Eli Manning and his trio of wide receivers, so look for them to draft -- or sign in free agency --corners and another pass rusher. The Pats need to re-sign or, more likely will franchise, free-agent-to-be WR Wes Welker and then add another impact wide receiver or two, while bidding farewell to Chad Ochocinco and perhaps Deion Branch."

Looking at the WR pool, *coughBrandonLloydcough*, I'm looking forward to this off-season! *coughSeeingHowImDesperatelyTryingNotToLookBackSneeze

Plus, last year's second round pick, Ras-I Dowling (who was put on IR early in the season) will be back to help out the secondary. And the Pats have two first round picks and two second round picks (which they will convert into first round picks in 2043). But, hey, they may actually use them. So, yeah, silver lining (because I got nothing else).

I still believe in you!

~ Derek

Friday, February 3, 2012

So I did Karaoke tonight...

Take a guess at what song I sung:


Really? That song? Nooo...

What is this, 1985? One more guess?

Wasn't that in a porno? Sounds familiar.

OK, I'll tell ya'll. It was this song:

Yes, this is Pearl Jam! Yes, it was 'Black'. No, I didn't pick this song because I'm black.

"I'm Black?"

Yes, a part of me wanted the people to ask themselves, "Really, THIS song? But, you'''re...a ... Bostonian. Why not pick faves, like Sweet Caroline or Journey or Some other common Karaoke song?"

To which I say..."exactly!"

Anyways, I gotta say, I fucking love being on stage! I was butchering the hell out of the song and there's no possible way I sounded anything that was be considered singing (There may also be video...which I hop, never comes to the surface). But, fuck...I loved performing. I mean, like, this is what I should be doing with my life! There was a point when I wasn't on stage. I was in my bedroom, all alone, in front of my mirror, singing my ass off.  And the crowd didn't even have my back. and I still enjoyed it. I can only image the feeling if the crowd was groovin' with me. Makes me wish I had some skill. Because there's no way I won't sing on stage every night! 

But, I can't sing. Aww....but I am kinda funny. This makes me think that I should get back into comedy. I've written so much down over the last six months, that I should be able to perform a solid 5 min set. Hell, my latest shit talked about how black people have no idea how long 5 mins is, which is kinda like how people going on diets underestimate how much they eat, so they can rationalize eating more.

Not very funny when I say it like that, but it could be something.

As I sign off, here's some more music from random rap guy. 

"Unknown rap is where real hip hop lies." - Me

~ Derek